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Shark Exorcist

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Possessed by Satan’s Shark!! Pray for her!’

Shark Exorcist is a 2015 US horror movie directed by former Splatter Times ‘zine editor and exploitation film veteran Donald Farmer (Cannibal Hookers; Red Lips; An Erotic Vampire in Paris) from a screenplay co-written with Alaine Huntington (Hi-8).

Both Huntington and Farmer are in the cast alongside Angela Kerecz (The Intruder 3D; The Final Table), Bobby Kerecz (Deathwoods), Alaine Huntington, James Balsamo (Terror Telly: Chopping ChannelsBite SchoolBurn in Hell)Roni Jonah (Volumes of Blood; Sasquatch vs. Yeti), Megan Hunt, Madison Carney, Lexi Nimmo, Kirstin Vanhooser, Gretchen Mosby, Julia Contrenchis, and Christy Moritz.

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IMDb | Facebook

More sharks on Horrorpedia: 2-Headed Shark Attack | Cruel Jaws | Ghost Shark | Great White | Jaws | Jaws 2 | Jersey Shore Shark Attack | Jurassic Shark | Mega Shark Versus Crocosaurus | Piranha Sharks | Psycho Shark | Sand Sharks | Shark Attack 3: Megalodon | The Shark is Still Working | Shark Week | Sharknado | Sharktopus | Snow Shark | Super Shark | Swamp Shark | Zombie Shark

 



Red Dragon – film

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Red Dragon is a 2002 American psychological thriller film based on Thomas Harris’ novel of the same name, featuring psychiatrist and serial killer Dr. Hannibal Lecter. It is a prequel toThe Silence of the Lambs (1991) and Hannibal (2001). The novel was originally adapted in the film Manhunter (1986). The film’s score was composed by Danny Elfman (Batman).

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The film was directed by Brett Ratner and written for the screen by Ted Tally, who also wrote the screenplay for The Silence of the Lambs. It again stars Anthony Hopkins as Lecter, a role he played twice before, and Edward Norton as FBI agent Will Graham. The film also stars Ralph Fiennes, Harvey Keitel, Emily Watson, Mary-Louise Parker and Philip Seymour Hoffman.

Red Dragon‘s theatrical release grossed $209,196,298 worldwide against a reported budget of $78 million.

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Buy on Blu-ray from Amazon.co.uk

Plot teaser:

In Baltimore, Maryland psychiatrist Dr. Hannibal Lecter attends a symphonic orchestra performance of A Midsummer Night’s Dream. The flute player repeatedly misses out on his part, profoundly irritating Lecter. Later, Lecter hosts a dinner party in his townhouse for the orchestra’s board of directors at which the disappearance of a musician, a flute player, is brought up during conversation.

After the party, Lecter is later visited by Will Graham, a gifted FBI agent and a psychologist, with whom he has been working on a psychological profile of a serial killer who has removed edible body parts from his victims, leading Graham to believe that the killer could be a cannibal. During the consultation, Graham discovers evidence implicating Lecter in the murders. Lecter attacks Graham, almost disembowelling him, before Graham overpowers Lecter. Lecter is sentenced to life imprisonment in an institution for the criminally insane while Graham, traumatised by the experience, retires from the FBI.

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Some years later, another serial killer, nicknamed “The Tooth Fairy”, appears. He stalks and kills seemingly random Southern families during sequential full moons. Hoping to capture the killer before his next attack, Special Agent Jack Crawford seeks Graham’s assistance in determining his psychological profile. When the death of another family weighs on his conscience, Graham reluctantly agrees. After visiting the crime scenes and speaking with Crawford, he concludes that he must once again consult Dr. Lecter for advice…

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Reviews:

‘ … audiences will be excused for any feelings of déjà vu the new film might inspire. That won’t prevent them from watching it in rapt, anxious silence, however, as the gruesome crimes, twisted psychology and deterministic dread that lie at the heart of Harris’ work are laid out with care and skill.’ Todd McCarthy, Variety

‘This darkly seductive, flawlessly acted piece is worlds removed from most horror films. Here monsters have their grandeur, heroes their gravity. And when they collide, a dance of death ensues between two souls doomed to understand each other.’ Richard Corliss, Time

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‘If you buy the overprocessed headcheese of the serial killer as refined genius, you’ll love Red Dragon. Or maybe not. Even Hannibal Lecter devotees may lose patience with this picture’s grandiose, self-serious ponderousness — that’s Lecterese for, ‘It’s kind of boring in patches, actually.’ Stephanie Zacharek, Salon

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‘To my surprise, Ratner does a sure, stylish job, appreciating the droll humor of Lecter’s predicament, creating a depraved new villain in the Tooth Fairy (Ralph Fiennes), and using the quiet, intense skills of Norton to create a character whose old fears feed into his new ones. There is also humor, of the uneasy he-can’t-get-away-with-this variety, in the character of a nosy scandal-sheet reporter (Philip Seymour Hoffman).’ RogerEbert.com

Cast:

Wikipedia | IMDb


Bloodborne – computer game

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Bloodborne – ブラッドボーン Buraddobōn – is a 2015 action role-playing computer game directed by Hidetaka Miyazaki, developed by From Software, and published by Sony Computer Entertainment for the PlayStation 4.

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Bloodborne features action role-playing elements similar to those found in director Miyazaki’s other games Demon’s Souls and Dark Souls. Players can return to a safe zone, known as the Hunters Dream, from lanterns spread throughout the world. Doing so replenishes health, but repopulates monsters in the game world. Combat is fast paced and requires an offensive approach in order for players to combat dense hordes of enemies.

The player character is agile and is able to perform sweeping dashes around enemies while locked on. The new risk versus reward style of gameplay is emphasized through Bloodborne ’​s health regain system, which allows the player to, within a small window of time, recover portions of lost health by striking back at the player’s attacker.

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Most melee weapons can transform into two alternate states; each state encourages a different approach to combat. The Saw Cleaver, for example, in its initial state can be used to quickly dispatch enemies in cramped areas, but when transformed into its secondary state it becomes an extended blade more suited for crowd control. The player can also wield a firearm in their left hand that can be used to stun enemies, which can then be followed up with a critical attack from the player’s melee weapon.

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Similar to Dark Souls, enemies drop experience points in the form of Blood Echoes. Should the player die, their blood echoes will be lost at the location of their death. If they are able to reach that point again they can regain them. Also, Blood Echoes may be captured by an opponent, typically identified by glowing purple eyes. Defeating this opponent will return lost Blood Echoes. Enemies also drop Blood Vials, used as healing potions, and Quicksilver Bullets, generic ammunition for ranged weaponry.

Multiplayer is present as well. By expending a consumable item, players can summon other players, to help with boss battles or large groups of enemies.

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Buy Bloodborne from Amazon.co.uk | Amazon.com

Reviews:

‘Bloodborne lies somewhere between Dark Souls and Dark Souls 2, better than the latter but not quite as good as the former. The fourth time following the same template means the master strokes, however masterful they are, are anticipated. But take nothing away from this brilliant, brooding, brutal reinvention, because almost as great as the best game ever is pretty bloody great.’ Ben Griffin, Games Radar

‘It’s terribly hard and more obscure than a bad Russian translation of a James Joyce novel, it also takes place in one of the least inviting settings you can imagine. It’s set in a grim old world, is Bloodborne. However, if you can embrace the gloom and hold on tight through its many hard-as-nails sections, you’re rewarded with one of the most involving and rewarding games of the current generation.’ Andrew Williams. Stuff.tv

‘As of this writing, there’s nothing I want to do other than play more Bloodborne, but honestly, what I’m most looking forward to is how much mileage the Souls community will get out of this experience. There’s so many lore videos to make, speedruns to shatter minds, and discussions to be had about just what the hell’s up with Bloodborne‘s twisted, Gothic world. And I can see myself staying up way too late for the next year wrapping my brain around all of it.’ Bob Mackey, US Gamer


Misery – film

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‘Paul Sheldon used to write for a living. Now, he’s writing to stay alive’

Misery is a 1990 American psychological thriller film based on Stephen King’s 1987 novel of the same name and starring James Caan, Kathy Bates, Lauren Bacall, Richard Farnsworth, and Frances Sternhagen. Directed by Rob Reiner, the film received critical acclaim for Bates’s performance as the psychopathic Annie Wilkes, and she won the 1990 Academy Award for Best Actress for her role.

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Plot teaser:

Sick of his 19th Century romantic heroine, Misery Chastain, novelist Paul Sheldon (James Caan) kills her off and writes a more personal, modern novel. When his car crashes in remote mountains he is saved by ‘number one fan’ Annie Wilkes (Kathy Bates), who adores Misery and has even named her pig after her. As she nurses him back to health at her remote dwelling, he realises she is not just going to let him go…

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The part of Paul Sheldon was originally offered to William Hurt (twice), then Kevin Kline, Michael Douglas, Harrison Ford, Dustin Hoffman, Robert De Niro, Al Pacino, Richard Dreyfuss, Gene Hackman and Robert Redford, but they all turned it down. Warren Beatty was interested in the role, wanting to turn him into a less passive character, but eventually had to drop out as post-production of Dick Tracy extended. Eventually someone suggested James Caan, who agreed to play the part. Caan commented that he was attracted by how Sheldon was a role unlike any other of his, and that “being a totally reactionary character is really much tougher.”

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In the original novel, Annie Wilkes lops off one of Paul Sheldon’s feet with an axe. Goldman loved the scene and argued for it to be included, but Reiner insisted that it be changed to that she only breaks his ankles. Goldman subsequently agreed this was the correct decision as amputation would have been too severe.

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Buy Misery on Blu-ray from Amazon.com | Amazon.co.uk

Reviews:

‘The terror in the film is very slow-burning, starting as something only mildly disturbing and carefully building towards full-blown horror. We’re given plenty of time to get to know the characters rather intimately, making the climactic confrontational scenes all the more effective. Too many thrillers and horror films jump right into the action without providing sufficient reason for us to care about what is happening. In Misery, the set-up is strong and the payoff is worth it.’ DVD Verdict

‘Yes, the book was richer, but for what it was Misery the film captured its black humour and its essential worries about who exploits whom in the entertainment world in an economical setting, and still made the audience wince where it counted.’ The Spinning Image

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‘Many competent directors could have done what Reiner does here, and perhaps many other actors could have done what Caan does, although the Kathy Bates performance is trickier and more special. The result is good craftsmanship, and a movie that works. It does not illuminate, challenge or inspire, but it works.’ Roger Ebert.com

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Wikipedia | IMDb

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Robert le Diable – opera

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Robert le Diable (translation: “Robert the Devil”) is an 1831 opera in five acts composed by Giacomo Meyerbeer from a libretto written by Eugène Scribe and Germain Delavigne. Robert le Diable is regarded as one of the first grand operas at the Paris Opéra. It derives some of its development from the medieval legend of Robert the Devil, a tale which was written in 13th Century France.

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The opera introduces Robert, Duke of Normandy, the son of a union between Bertha and Bertram, a disciple of Satan, perhaps even a demon himself. In Normandy, alongside several other knights, he attempts to win favour with the beautiful Princess Isabelle. A minstrel, Raimbaut, inadvertently singing a song that referred to Robert as a devil is imprisoned by the enraged Robert but is granted forgiveness when Robert realises his fiancée is his foster-sister, Alice. Under the influence of a disguised Bertram, whom Robert is unaware is his father, let alone a devil, the duke gambles, leaves the door open for the Prince of Granada to woo Isabella and sees Raimbaut given a sack of gold to pursue love interests other than Alice.

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By the time Bertram reveals to Robert that he is his father, he has communed with the devil himself, an event overheard by Alice who learns from the depraved chanting that if Bertram cannot convince his son to sell his soul to Satan by midnight, he will lose control over Robert forever. Bertram discovers he is being spied upon and threatens Alice, who leaves. He turns his attentions to his son who he informs could win back Isabelle by taking possession of a magic branch which grants invisibility, hanging near the tomb of Saint Rosalia in a nearby cloister. He agrees, despite knowing this is sacrilege and is punished by zombie nuns, the remains of sisters who lived with impure thoughts, who rise from their graves to taunt him.

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Avoiding their suggestive drinking and dancing, he escapes with the branch and seeks to interrupt the imminent marriage of Isabelle and the Prince. With the clock approaching midnight, Bertram fails in his attempts and is cast down to Hell, leaving his son to step in and marry the Princess.

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The opera was an immediate success on its premier in 1831 and drew plaudits from the likes of Franz Liszt, Alexandre Dumas (who featured the opera in his classic tale, The Count of Monte Cristo) and Edgar Degas. Brass (some provided by the now rarely used ophicleide, a forerunner to the bass tuba), fabricated thunder effects and baritone voices create unease throughout the opera, the Gothic drama of which comes to a head in the graveyard sequence where the hero is attacked by ghostly nuns rising from their tombs, Robert having to fend them off with supernatural powers. In many productions, this sequence is carefully choreographed to make the nuns particularly horrific and moving in unnatural ways.

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Whilst the opera was so successful that Meyerbeer became a celebrity and was feted by the French court, it is said that his rival, the Italian Rossini, was so affected by Robert le Diable that he retired from composition. The opera has been compared to Andrew Lloyd Webber’s Phantom of the Opera, and is in fact mentioned by name in the musical. Considered shocking at the time of creation and still performed around the world today, the opera last appeared at London’s Covent Garden Opera House in 2012.

Daz Lawrence, Horrorpedia

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Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Mouse

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Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Mouse is a 1947 American one-reel MGM animated cartoon and is the 30th Tom and Jerry short. The cartoon was released on 14 June 1947, and was directed by William Hanna and Joseph Barbera produced by Fred Quimby and animated by Ed Barge, Michael Lah, Kenneth Muse and Al Grandmain. The episode is a parody of Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde.

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Hanna Barbera also created Scooby-Doo, Where Are You! and subsequent series; The Funky Phantom; Goober and the Ghost Chasers; Valley of the DinosaursThe Addams Family cartoons; Godzilla animated seriesDrak Pack and Gravedale High.

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Plot teaser:

Tiring of Jerry stealing the milk out of his bowl, Tom poisons it. Instead of killing the mouse, the potion transforms him into a muscular beast…

 

Wikipedia | IMDb

 


Kiss Me Quick! aka Dr. Breedlove

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Kiss Me Quick! is a 1964 American sci-fi horror nudie cutie movie directed by Peter Perry (as Seymour Tuchus) and produced by Harry Novak. The film was originally titled Dr Breedlove or Dr Breedlove or How I Stopped Worrying and Love to exploit the title of Stanley Kubrick’s Dr Strangelove. It was retitled to exploit Billy Wilder’s Kiss Me, Stupid. The highlight of the movie involves a dance number in which three of Breedlove’s captive women gyrate to garage rock.

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Hungarian-born cinematographer László Kovács worked on The Incredibly Strange Creatures Who Stopped Living and Became Mixed-Up Zombies the same year but eventually shot such notable productions as Easy Rider and New York, New York. His genre work includes Ghostbusters.

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Plot teaser:

Sterilox, an alien from the “Buttless” galaxy being sent to Earth in order to find the perfect woman who will be used to create a race of servants. Sterilox (who sounds like Stan Laurel) is teleported into the lab of a mad scientist by the name of Dr. Breedlove, who offers Sterilox a number of beautiful women to choose from. He’s also introduced to Frankie Stein, Dracula and a strange Mummy…

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Reviews:

‘ … as a monument to the moment when filmmakers found the chutzpah to challenge the wildly unconstitutional claims that kept movies in the decency Dark Ages for several decades, Harry Novak’s horror hi-jinx were instrumental in paving the way for greater cinematic openness. In essence, he moved nudity out of the camp and into the realm of ordinary comedy. As entertaining as Kiss Me Quick remains, its industry significance cannot be understated. Indeed, it was monsters that helped make nakedness a non-issue for the grindhouse gang.’ Bill Gibron, Pop Matters

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‘ … there is no denying the high amount of entertainment value present. The surf punk garage band instrumental music, for one thing, is first rate … All of the women are luscious, in their bouffants and spit curls, breasts thankfully free of major surgical enhancement and liberated to move like they have a mind of their own. And while the overall acting is from the “borrow someone else’s shtick” school of mimicry (Dr. Breedlove sounds like a thick tongued Bela Lugosi), you can tell the cast is having a wonderful time. This is a non-politically correct monster mash celebration of women as full blown sexual objects, a jeer at the tameness of the times and a leering look and lampooning of lust.’ DVD Verdict

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Buy with House on Bare Mountain on DVD from Amazon.co.uk | Amazon.com

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Choice dialogue:

Skull: “Gee whizz? Bring back the broads.”

Dr. Breedlove: “I show you Lady Godiva and you ask me does the horse plays the piano. Who cares?”

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Cast:

Wikipedia | IMDb | Image thanks: Critical Condition


The Samurai

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The Samurai – original title Der Samurai – is a 2014 German fantasy horror film directed by Till Kleinert and starring Michel Diercks, Pit Bukowski, and Uwe Preuss.

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Plot Teaser

A wolf strives through the woods around an isolated German village. Jakob the young local police officer is on to him, but scents something more in the darkness. What he finds is a man, it seems, wild eyed, of wiry build, in a dress. He carries a katana, a Samurai sword. When the Samurai invites Jakob to follow him on his crusade towards the village, it becomes Jakob’s mission to pursue the lunatic to end this wanton destruction. At the end of the night Jakob has experienced too much, is too far from whom he once was. Something hidden has been unleashed to meet the first rays of daylight…

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Buy The Samurai on DVD from Amazon.co.uk | Amazon.com

Reviews

“Owing something to The Company Of Wolves, this is film which, like all the best queer cinema, bites off more than it can chew. Its success in winning over mainstream horror audiences, however, is testament to the fact it still has teeth.” Eye For Film

“Bound to divide audiences, The Samurai is a bold piece of film making from Germany and one that should be embraced by those looking for something more to their bloody action.” Nerdly

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“Once things come to a head, Der Samurai takes a step into the truly phantasmagorical and a conclusion that can be read a couple of different ways, which may leave certain viewers unsatisfied. Others may want to go back and experience the film a second time to pick up on potential clues. Either way, it’s always refreshing to see a horror film with the potential to spark discussion about more than whether it satisfies the genre’s basic requirements.” Fangoria

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IMDb

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Cello

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Cello (Korean: 첼로) is a 2005 South Korean horror film directed by Lee Woo-cheol and starring Sung Hyun-ah, Park Da-an and Jeong Ho-bin.

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Plot Teaser:

After surviving a terrifying car accident that killed her best friend, Mi-ju longs for a peaceful and stable life as a music teacher at a local college. But when horrifying memories of her accident begin to surface, her tranquil life quickly becomes a nightmare. A supernatural evil seeks revenge against her and her family, and until she knows the reason why, no one is safe…

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Buy Cello on DVD from Amazon.com | Amazon.co.uk

Reviews:

“At a time in which many Western genre films are dumbed down to the point of idiocy, any film that expects its audience to do a little work to join the narrative dots has to be seen as a good thing. And when prepared to stand on its own creative feet, Cello tells its story well, aided by decent performances and an effective music score.” Cineoutsider

“There are two notable things about Cello: some nice cello music and humorous moments involving Mi-ju’s cute as a button young daughter. Alas, everything else is lacking, with the first hour feeling like an eternity, mainly because nothing happens to warrant keeping your eyes open at all (with the exception of a hanging that’s pretty neat, if a tad silly).” Beyond Hollywood

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“Although the cinematography and music are quite atmospheric, the film’s attempts to balance all these elements and more means that the pacing is erratic and just as the film starts to weave its spell we cut to another aspect of the story and watch it build up to something intriguing before once again before cutting away again.” DVD Beaver

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Wikipedia | IMDb

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Calamity of Snakes

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Calamity of Snakes  – original title: Ren she da zhan – is a 1983 Hong Kong/Taiwan horror film directed by Chi Chang as William Chang Kee. It stars Lei Chang, Chung-Lien Chou, and Tung-min Huang.

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Plot Teaser:

When a construction crew kills a large group of snakes while building a hotel, an ancient snake curse is cast on the building and all hell breaks loose…

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Some scenes from Calamity of Snakes were spliced into the 1985 English language production Serpent Warriors, an unsurprisingly low-budget affair starring Clint Walker as a zoologist sent in to get rid of a nest of snakes (controlled by a voodoo priestess played by Eartha Kitt) infesting a construction site. None of the animal death footage, which the film is notorious for, was used.

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 Buy Calamity of Snakes on DVD from Amazon.co.uk | Amazon.com

Reviews

“Calamity of Snakes is a strange beast. On the one hand, it’s kind of incredible with scene after scene of amazing set-pieces, but then you remember that you’re watching hundreds upon hundreds of snakes being massacred and you start to feel depressed. It’s one hell of an experience.” Mondo Exploito

“Certainly, Calamity of Snakes is not a film for everyone. As stated before, even horror fans may have issues with the movie due to the footage of real animal killing. And certainly, the issue of whether the killing of dozens of animals in order to produce a cheap B-list horror picture is justified is not really something that can be distilled and discussed thoroughly in the confines of a short internet review. But I will say that there is a certain segment of people out there that have a love for this sort of cinema, and, for them, Calamity of Snakes deserves its’ elevated status in the genre.” HKFilm

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“Calamity Of Snakes demands attention and respect . You’ve been warned but largely because this is an incredible piece of exploitation.” So Good Reviews

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Mega Shark vs. Kolossus

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Mega Shark vs. Kolossus is a 2015 action sci-fi horror movie directed by Christopher Ray (Reptisaurus; MegacondaMega Shark vs. Crocosaurus) from a screenplay by Micho Rutare for The Asylum. It stars Ileana Douglas, Brody Hutzler, Clare Grant, Alison Haislip, Amy Rider, Milynn Sarley, Ernest Thomas, Rileah Vanderbilt.

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Plot teaser:

In search of a new energy source, Russia accidentally reawakens the Kolossus – a giant robot doomsday device from the Cold War. At the same time, a new Mega Shark appears, threatening global security…

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The film is being unleashed on 7th June 2015.

IMDb | Image thanks: Dread Central

Sharksploitation on Horrorpedia: 2-Headed Shark Attack | Atomic SharkAvalanche Sharks | Cruel Jaws | Ghost Shark | Ghost Shark 2: Urban JawsGreat White | Hammerhead: Shark Frenzy aka SharkManJaws | Jaws 2 | Jersey Shore Shark Attack | Jurassic Shark | Malibu Shark Attack | Mega Shark vs. Crocosaurus | Mega Shark vs. Giant OctopusMega Shark vs. Kolossus Piranha Sharks | Psycho Shark | Raiders of the Lost SharkSand Sharks | Shark Attack 3: Megalodon | Shark ExorcistThe Shark is Still Working | Shark LakeShark Week | Sharkansas Women’s Prison Massacre | Sharknado | Sharknado 2: The Second OneSharknado 3: Oh Hell No! | Sharktopus | Sharktopus vs. MermantulaSharktopus vs. Pteracuda | Sky SharksSnow Shark | Super Shark | Swamp Shark | Zombie Shark


They Live

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“Obey”

They Live is a 1988 American science fiction film written and directed by John Carpenter (Halloween; The Fog; The Thing). The film stars Roddy Piper, Keith David, and Meg Foster. It follows a nameless drifter referred to as “Nada”, who discovers the ruling class are in fact aliens concealing their appearance and manipulating people to spend money, breed and accept the status quo with subliminal messages in mass media. Many consider it the defining film commentating on Reagan-era consumerism and corporate greed.

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Unemployed drifter, Nada (wrestling star, “Rowdy” Roddy Piper, Hell Comes to Frogtown) lives in 1980’s America, a place where free-thinking is discouraged and those outside the system are forced to make ends meet however they can. After taking a job as a casual labourer on a building site, he befriends the similarly disaffected Frank Armitage (Keith David; The Thing; Pitch Black) but both are soon alerted to the strange loud preaching conducted by a blind man (Raymond St. Jacques, Voodoo Dawn) in a nearby church, along with an unusually attentive night-time helicopter presence.

Nada investigates and finds the church is a front for less savoury activities. The interruption of local television signals and plans to demolish the nearby shanty town where he is staying all seem to be connected and when exploring the building he uncovers a sophisticated scientific set-up and some carefully concealed boxes. His snooping uncovered, he ‘liberates’ one of the boxes to examine at a more convenient time. When that time comes, he finds what look initially like unassuming sunglasses but upon wearing them finds that they uncover a strange black and white version of his familiar surroundings, unveiling a world packed with totalitarian commands throughout all media and, even more disturbingly, that the average person walking down the street ready to accept this doctrine is a skull-faced alien being.

theylive14 The aliens soon recognise that Nada has seen through their disguise and with advanced communication systems (which also allow teleportation) in their watches, pursue him, lest their secret is revealed to the other humans who still outnumber them. Escaping, Nada takes local Cable 64 TV executive, Holly Thompson (Meg Foster; Leviathan; Stepfather II) hostage desperate to convince her of his findings and reveal them to the world. Unwilling to believe him, they part when she calls the police, Nada making his way back to the abandoned box of glasses to distribute to the masses. He bumps into Frank and a lengthy fight ensues, after which Nada explains all and the pair attempt to unravel the plot.

theylive7 They find that members of their demolished shanty town have formed a collective, they too in rebellion against the alien oppressors. Wearing modified alien-revealing contact lenses, they resolve to destroy the transmission signal which is projecting the aliens’ brainwashing messages. The aliens are revealed to be working alongside complicit human industrialists, soaking up the Earth’s resources to enhance their own world, reducing Earthlings to slaves and the planet hobbled by global warming. Can Nada and the activists stop the aliens before the whole world obeys?

theylive5 They Live comes at the end of John Carpenter’s golden period, signs of fatigue already evident; the love it or hate it Big Trouble in Little China (1986), the moments of brilliance of Prince of Darkness (1987) tempered by clumsy narrative and dubious acting even then not predicting the agony of some of his 90’s output. Fortunately, Carpenter made the film before the curse of the horror director struck; the ham-fisted, elephantine social commentary which blighted film-makers such as George Romero’s latter day zombie films.

theylive18 The film is based in part on Ray Nelson’s 1963 short story, “8 O’Clock in the Morning” (or even more likely, the 1986 comic book anthology, Alien Encounters), telling not only in the narrative but also in the length – a classic film it may be but it does feel stretched, indeed it’s remarkable that Carpenter managed to keep proceedings on track – we learn quickly what the problem it takes some time for us to be told the solution – as an A-Z, we are certainly taken the scenic route. It is clear who Carpenter has an issue with socially and we aren’t given any choice as to who we should side with. In interviews since, he has been even more overt, referring to the oppressors in the film as “Republicans” – fortunately, he restrains himself slightly more behind the camera, a breezy sense of humour preventing stagnation by indignation.

nada As a satire, the film works, even with slightly comic book aliens as the enemy force, the concept of rich individuals and huge corporations controlling how we live our lives is certainly well within the realms of credibility. The glossy win-at-all-costs capitalist city versus a shanty town of rags and tin-can-hat homeless folk (not to mention the hero literally being called ‘nothing’), may jar a little as an extreme comparison but the subliminal messages which proliferate advertising boards, television and all forms of media feel chilling in the climate of yuppies and excess, certainly no less perverse than the attack on greed and superficiality of American Psycho. The subliminal messages themselves have become iconic; “Consume”, “Do Not Question Authority, “Marry and Reproduce” and, of course, “Obey”.

theylive4 The film was shot in Los Angeles in March 1988, working from Carpenter’s own screenplay, alongside other key crew members who had regularly worked in the genre or with Carpenter; cinematographer Gary B. Kibbe (Halloween II; Misery), producer Larry J. Franco (The Thing; Mars Attacks!) and make-up artist Francisco X. Pérez (Evilspeak; Friday 13th Part III). The make-up effects of the aliens are made from painted latex, be-wigged skulls which are reminiscent of humans but strange enough to reveal their true menace. Perhaps due to the majority of the shots of the aliens being in black and white, they are genuinely unsettling and have become ironic in their own right, a spoof of the infamous Oscars ‘selfie’ soon being digitally altered for, ironically, satirical effect. Towards the end of the film the aliens are shown in colour, the filter device abandoned.

theylive3 Piper’s casting as Nada is a surprising choice, though is fitting with Carpenter’s love of disposable pop culture, from B-Movies to video games, the actor coming straight from the carnival of Wrestlemania III ring. Something of a blank canvas to work from, Piper’s legacy is two-fold; the line, “I have come here to chew bubblegum and kick ass… and I’m all out of bubblegum” (a line from his little black book of wrestling bon mots) and the incredibly lengthy fist-fight between Nada and Armitage, which lasts five minutes and twenty seconds. The fight was choreographed by Piper without Carpenter’s knowledge, though the director was so impressed that he elected to keep it in the film uncut.

theylive10 It almost goes without saying that the soundtrack is the work of Carpenter himself, assisted as he often was around this period by Alan Howarth. It is extremely circular; repeated pulsing beats, clicks and rhythms tell of an ominous threat but rather more of one which really is ever-present and already amongst us – it is certainly one of Carpenter’s least chilling scores. Rooted less in supernatural groans and synthetic, eyeless threat, the white collar blues-ish harmonica (synthesised) and military percussion suggest a very contemporary landscape as well as the relentlessness of the benign forces in the film, both the aliens and their human collaborators. As a stand-alone piece, it’s not as enjoyable as earlier Carpenter scores but in the context of the film it has improved somewhat with age. The score has seen several releases on CD and a particularly impressive limited coloured vinyl version on Spencer Hickman’s Death Waltz label.

theylivevinyl Made on a modest budget of around $3 million, the film opened to largely muted critical response, the majority disappointed in an apparent lack of imagination and the constant return to Carpenter’s beloved B-Movies as a source of influence.

In her review for The New York Times, Janet Maslin wrote, “Since Mr. Carpenter seems to be trying to make a real point here, the flatness of They Live is doubly disappointing. So is its crazy inconsistency, since the film stops trying to abide even by its own game plan after a while.” Richard Harrington wrote in The Washington Post, “it’s just John Carpenter as usual, trying to dig deep with a toy shovel. The plot for They Live is full of black holes, the acting is wretched, the effects are second-rate. In fact, the whole thing is so preposterous it makes V look like Masterpiece Theatre”.

theylive13 The paying audience were slightly more forgiving, sending the film to number one at the American box office, grossing $4,827,000 during its opening weekend and ultimately $13,008,928. The film was, however, very fleeting in its residence in the top ten, the irony being that Halloween 4 was deemed such a threat to its takings that it had its release date moved to avoid the competition (they weren’t wrong, it took nearly $18,000,000).

theylive20 Time has been kind to the film’s reputation, both critics and fans warming to it in the decades since – perhaps the barbed commentary seems more insightful in retrospect or maybe the 80’s are far enough away now for us to be more gently mocking, rather than us thinking it’s us who are the joke. The film’s imagery has been hugely influential, rarely more so than on graffiti artist Shepard Fairey, whose Andre the Giant ‘Obey’ image now adorns t-shirts worldwide as commonplace as Ramones or Motorhead iconography. Nada’s “bubblegum” line has been used in a video game (Duke Nukem 3D) and by Richard Ayoade’s character in Channel 4 comedy The IT Crowd (“I came here to drink milk and kick ass. And I’ve just finished my milk.”), whilst the fight scene has been aped in the long-running adult animation series, South Park.

Daz Lawrence, Horrorpedia

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The Bloodstained Shadow

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Solamente nero – released internationally as The Bloodstained Shadow, Bloodstained Shadow and Only Blackness – is a 1978 Italian giallo horror thriller film directed by Antonio Bido, starring Lino Capolicchio, Stefania Casini and Craig Hill.

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Plot teaser:

When a young college professor (Lino Capolicchio of The House With the Laughing Windows) returns home to visit his Catholic priest brother (Craig Hill of Dracula vs Frankenstein), prominent members of the community begin to be stalked and slaughtered by an unknown killer. Can the brothers uncover the identity of this deranged fiend, even while they are being tortured by their own nightmares of an unspeakable childhood trauma?

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Buy The Bloodstained Shadow on 88 Films Blu-ray from Amazon.co.uk

Reviews:

The Bloodstained Shadow has a satisfyingly labyrinthine plot, plenty of shock cuts and some well-orchestrated murder scenes (especially the demise of the medium during a thunderstorm). Antonio Bido (The Cat’s Victims) again takes his cue from Dario Argento but makes excellent use of the winding passages and narrow waterways of the Venetian island of Murano to add the atmosphere. Meanwhile, Stelvio Cipriani’s enjoyable score gleefully incorporates well-known cues from prog rock band Goblin. On the downside, Lino Capolicchio is a typically ineffectual hero, a genre convention, seemingly – and wears some particularly off-putting knitwear to remind us this was made in Italy in 1978.

Adrian J Smith, Horrorpedia

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“While a little overlong at 109 minutes – the pace does tend to slacken on occasion, between the effectively tense stalking scenes – The Bloodstained Shadow is nevertheless a masterfully eerie addition to the giallo world. Laced with surprises, and enough damning glances to make nearly everyone a suspect, Bido brilliantly guides us through misty waterways, dark alleys, and overpopulated cemeteries to provide an intriguing and thrilling giallo experience.” DeadShed

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“For all its strengths, The Bloodstained Shadow fails to make it into the top “tier” of gialli. The script is almost entirely derivative of other offerings in the genre, taking most of its cues from Argento’s work.” The Digital Fix

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Wikipedia | IMDb

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Crash! (1977)

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Crash! is a 1977 film produced and directed by Charles Band (Parasite; Evil Bong 420Ooga Booga) from a screenplay by Marc Marais (House of the Living Dead).

The film stars José Ferrer (Blood and RosesZoltan… Hound of Dracula; Bloody Birthday), Sue Lyon (The Astral Factor; End of the World; Alligator), John Ericson, Leslie Parrish (The Giant Spider Invasion; The Astral Factor), John Carradine, Jerome Guardino (Octaman; Tarantulas: The Deadly Cargo; Victims), John Hayes (director of Dream No Evil, Garden of the Dead, Grave of the Vampire) and Reggie Nalder. The funky score is by Andrew Belling (The Killing KindZoltan… Hound of Dracula).

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Plot teaser:

A jealous invalid husband (Ferrer) tries to kill his attractive younger blonde wife (Lyon), but she uses occult powers to take her revenge…

Reviews: 

‘ … even for all its faults, whether they be of the rough-around-the-edges variety or of the what-where-they-thinking variety, Crash! is so kooky it’s hard dismiss it outright. This is a bizarre cinematic curiosity worth tracking down if you’re a fan of truly oddball cinema.’ Dread Central

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Crash! is a fun B-movie with lots of great explosions and slow-mo car crashes. The added supernatural elements were interesting and unexpected, adding another layer of fun on top of the car action. The acting was pretty good from the cast, with José Ferrer standing out as the invalid husband and Sue Lyon holding her own as the hero/victim … It’s definitely got a low-budget 70s vibe to it, so if that’s a turn-off, be warned.’ Silver Emulsion Film Reviews

Buy Crash! on Full Moon DVD from Amazon.com

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‘This film is profoundly weird, although I’m not sure how much of that weirdness was intended. With its somnambulant acting, jumbled narrative and cheapjack filmmaking, the whole thing has a strangely disconnected, almost dreamlike air that was evidently due to ineptitude on the part of Charles Band … The copious car chases and crashes appear to be the film’s primary reason for being, yet they’re quite clumsily filmed and edited.’ Fright.com

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Buy Empire of the ‘B’s from Amazon.co.ukAmazon.com

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Choice dialogue:

“Her eyes were like living fire”

Related: The Car | ChristineDuel | KilldozerMaximum Overdrive


Lake Placid vs. Anaconda

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Lake Placid vs. Anaconda is a 2015 made-for-television action-horror-thriller film directed by A.B. Stone from a screenplay by Berkeley Anderson (Robocroc; Monster Ark; S.S. Doomtrooper). The film is a crossover between the Lake Placid – and Anaconda – film series.

The film stars Robert Englund, Yancy Butler (previous two Lake Placid films; Shark WeekHansel & Gretel Get Baked), Corin Nemec (Sand Sharks; Rise of the Dinosaurs; Haunted: 333), Nigel Barber (RobosharkAttack of the Killer Tomatoes!), Laura Dale (Roboshark), Ali Eagle (Mostly Ghostly: Have You Met My Ghoulfriend?), Isaac Haig (Dead People TV series).

This UFO Films production is set for release on Syfy on April 25, 2015, at 9.00 pm.

Plot teaser:

A giant alligator battles with a giant anaconda snake. The town sheriff must find a way to destroy the two monsters before they kill the whole town.

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Wikipedia | IMDb



Devoured

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‘You will be’

Devoured is a 2012 American horror movie directed by Greg Olliver – his feature film directorial debut. The film had its world premiere on May 6, 2012 at the Bilbao Fantasy Film Festival and stars Marta Milans, Kara Jackson and Bruno Gunn.

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Plot teaser:

Lourdes (Marta Milans) is a young woman from El Salvador that has come to New York City in hopes of raising enough money to help care for her ill son, who lives with Lourdes’s mother back in her home country. She works in an upscale restaurant where her boss mistreats her, her boss’s boyfriend sexually assaults her, and various men forcefully solicit her for sexual favours. Lourdes endures all of this as she cannot afford to lose her job and while she is reluctant to prostitute herself, she will do anything in order to raise enough money for her son’s surgery. Her only solace is found in her phone calls to her son in El Salvador and her interactions with Frankie (Bruno Gunn), a firefighter that is the only person in New York who has shown Lourdes any true kindness. While cleaning the restaurant one night, Lourdes begins to experience strange visions where she sees strange shadowy figures that seem out to get her…

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Buy Devoured on DVD from Amazon.co.uk | Amazon.com

Reviews:

‘Devoured is a slow burner. You’ve got to have patience with it, but you will be rewarded with a pretty fantastic ending that you won’t see coming. Writer Marc Landau put together a unique tale that’s unlike anything we’ve seen before, and Olliver takes a very small cast and brings the story to life. And Milans absolutely carries the picture. Overall, it’s an entertaining film that’ll impress you. Have patience; it’s worth the wait.’ Dread Central

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Devoured mixes social commentary and dour New York alienation into its character study-cum-psychological horror format. It looks good and is competently acted, but a predictable climax and all-too familiar route getting to that point prevent it from being anything more than a fairly decent watch.’ Sex Gore Mutants

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Devoured is a hugely impressive film on all levels. The cast’s performances are subtle and understated, played with convincing believability but it is Milans who stands out. In a film such as this the lead role is all important (there is barely a scene she is not in) and Milans delivers with brooding intensity.’ Horror Asylum

Wikipedia | IMDb


The Enfield Haunting – TV mini-series

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The Enfield Haunting is a forthcoming British drama series that has been commissioned by Sky Living and is due to be aired in Spring 2015. Kristoffer Nyholm, who rose to fame after the popular Danish series, The Killing, is directing the new three-parter. The series is based on Guy Lyon Playfair’s book, This House Is Haunted and is about a series of bizarre events around the phenomena known as ‘The Enfield Poltergeist’ that apparently took place at a council house in North London in 1977.

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The Conjuring 2: The Enfield Poltergeist film is based on the same paranormal case.

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Matthew Macfadyen (GrindhouseRipper Street) is playing Guy Lyon Playfair, an experienced but skeptical paranormal investigator. Timothy Spall (The Bride; Gothic; Dream Demon; Wake Wood) plays Maurice Grosse, a fledgling paranormal researcher. Juliet Stevenson also joins the cast to play Maurice’s wife Betty Grosse.

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Cast:

Wikipedia | IMDb


Godzilla – Playstation game

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Godzilla is a Bandai Namco computer game for PS3 and PS4 that is released on 14th July 2015 in North America and 17th July 2015 in Europe.

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The game has been animated to look like the 1960s and 1970s Godzilla films, and also features kaiju monsters Destroyah, Gamera, Gigan, MechaGodzilla, Mothra and King Ghidorah. The aim of the game is to destroy as much of the city as possible.

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Buy Godzilla PS4 game from Amazon.com

Game play:

  • Destruction: Bash your way through each stage to take out the Energy Generator and proceed to the next area. Be sure to smash as many other buildings in the stage as possible to maximize your G-Energy.
  • Movie Style Action: Players can choose to view the action with a special Movie-Style Camera Angle System. Choosing this camera angle switches the camera view to special, pre-set locations on the map.
  • Multiple Modes: Mission Mode – Crush your way through over 20 stages of mayhem! Diorama Mode – Build the Godzilla scene of their dreams! King of Monsters Mode.
  • Power-Up: Collect G-Energy in each stage to Power-Up your Godzilla! Grow Godzilla from 50 up to 100 Meters tall. Godzilla’s defensive and offensive prowess will increase in line with his size.

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Some images thanks to: Gamesradar

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Loch Ness Monster – mythology/folklore

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Loch Ness Monster, also called Nessie, is a cryptid that reputedly inhabits the Loch Ness lake in the Scottish Highlands. It is similar to other supposed lake monsters in Scotland and elsewhere, though its description varies from one account to the next, with most describing it as large in size. Popular interest and belief in the animal’s existence has varied since it was first brought to the world’s attention in 1933. Evidence of its existence is anecdotal, with minimal and much-disputed photographic material and sonar readings. The creature has been affectionately referred to by the nickname Nessie (Scottish Gaelic: Niseag) since the 1940s.

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The most common speculation among believers is that the creature represents a line of long-surviving plesiosaurs. Much of the scientific community regards the Loch Ness Monster as a modern-day myth, and explains sightings as including mis-identifications of more mundane objects, outright hoaxes, and wishful thinking. Despite this, it remains one of the most famous examples of cryptozoology, aided by the sheer size of the loch – equivalent to all the other lakes in the UK combined.

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The first reported sighting of something unusual lurking near Loch Ness (actually the River Ness) appears in the Life of St. Columba by Adomnán, written in the 7th century. According to Adomnán, writing about a century after the events he described, the Irish monk Saint Columba was staying in the land of the Picts with his companions when he came across the locals burying a man by the River Ness. They explained that the man had been swimming the river when he was attacked by a “water beast” that had mauled him and dragged him under. They tried to rescue him in a boat, but were able only to drag up his corpse. Hearing this, Columba stunned the Picts by sending his follower Luigne moccu Min to swim across the river. The beast came after him, but Columba made the sign of the Cross and commanded: “Go no further. Do not touch the man. Go back at once.” The beast immediately halted as if it had been “pulled back with ropes” and fled in terror, and both Columba’s men and the pagan Picts praised God for the miracle.

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In truth, many waterways had legends very similar to this attached to them, usually with a pious soul saving the day. It took a very long time for any further activity to be widely reported. It was only in October 1871, or 1872, that a Doctor D. Mackenzie of Balnain described seeing an object that looked much like a log or upturned boat “wriggling and churning up the water.” The object moved slowly at first, then disappeared off at a faster speed. Mackenzie sent a letter containing his story to Rupert Gould in 1934, shortly after popular interest in the monster skyrocketed.

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A sighting on July 22nd 1933 can most reasonably be considered the true Year Zero of Nessie activity, though ironically, not in the water but on land. George Spicer and his wife saw ‘a most extraordinary form of animal’ cross the road in front of their car. They described the creature as having a large body (about 1.2 metres (3 ft 11 in) high and 7.6 metres (25 ft) long), and long, narrow neck, slightly thicker than an elephant’s trunk and as long as the 10–12-foot (3–4 m) width of the road; the neck had undulations in it. They saw no limbs, possibly because of a dip in the road obscuring the animal’s lower portion. It lurched across the road towards the loch 20 yards (20 m) away, leaving only a trail of broken undergrowth in its wake. Five years later, Invernesshire Chief Constable William Fraser wrote a letter stating that it was beyond doubt the monster existed and stated the potential hunting parties it would attract were of major concern.

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In August 1933 a motorcyclist named Arthur Grant claimed to have nearly hit the creature while approaching Abriachan on the north-eastern shore, at about 1 a.m. on a moonlit night. Grant claimed that he saw a small head attached to a long neck, and that the creature saw him and crossed the road back into the loch. A veterinary student, he described it as a hybrid between a seal and a plesiosaur. Grant said he dismounted and followed it to the loch, but only saw ripples. Some believe this story was intended as a humorous explanation of a motorcycle accident.

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Sightings of the monster increased following the building of a road along the loch in early 1933, bringing both workmen and tourists to the formerly isolated area. Sporadic land sightings continued until 1963, when film of the creature was shot in the loch from a distance of 4 kilometres. Because of the distance at which it was shot, it has been described as poor quality.

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On 12 November 1933, Hugh Gray was walking along the loch after church when he spotted a substantial commotion in the water. A large creature rose up from the lake. Gray took several pictures of it, but only one of them showed up after they were developed. This image appeared to show a creature with a long tail and thick body at the surface of the loch. The image is blurred suggesting the animal was splashing. Four stumpy-looking objects on the bottom of the creature’s body might possibly be a pair of appendages, such as flippers. Although critics have claimed that the photograph is of Gray’s labrador retriever swimming towards the camera (possibly carrying a stick), researcher Roland Watson rejects this interpretation and suggests there is an eel-like head on the right side of the image. This is the first known photograph allegedly taken of the Loch Ness Monster.

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In December 1954 a strange sonar contact was made by the fishing boat Rival III. The vessel’s crew observed sonar readings of a large object keeping pace with the boat at a depth of 146 metres (479 ft). It was detected travelling for 800 m (2,600 ft) in this manner, before contact was lost, but then found again later. Many sonar attempts had been made previously, but most were either inconclusive or negative.

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The most iconic Nessie photo was supposedly taken by Robert Kenneth Wilson, a London gynaecologist and was published in the Daily Mail on 21 April 1934. Wilson’s refusal to have his name associated with the photograph led to it being nicknamed the “Surgeon’s Photograph”. He claimed that he was looking at the loch when he saw the monster, so he grabbed his camera and snapped four photos. Only two exposures came out clear: the first one shows what was claimed to be a small head and back, while the second one shows a similar head in a diving position. The first one was more iconic one, while the second attracted little publicity because it was difficult to interpret what was depicted, due to its blurry quality.

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For many years, the photo was regarded as good evidence of the monster. However, skeptics variously dismissed it showing a piece of driftwood, a bathing circus elephant, an otter, or a bird. Another factor that was brought up by skeptics was the scale of the photo; it is often cropped to make the monster seem proportionally large and the small ripples seem like large waves, while the original uncropped shot shows the other end of the loch and the monster in the centre. Despite this, the ripples on the photo were found to fit the size and circular pattern of small ripples, as opposed to large waves when photographed up close. Analysis of the original uncropped image fostered further doubt.

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In 1993, the makers of Discovery Communications’ documentary Loch Ness Discovered analysed the uncropped image and found a white object was visible in every version of the photo, implying it was on the negative. It was believed to be the cause of the ripples, as if the object was being towed, though it could not be ruled out as a blemish in the negative. Additionally, one analysis of the full photograph revealed the object was quite small, only about 60 to 90 cm (2 to 3 ft) long.

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Details of how the photo was accomplished were published in the 1999 book, Nessie – the Surgeon’s Photograph Exposed, that contains a facsimile of the 1975 article in The Sunday Telegraph. Essentially, it was a toy submarine built by Christian Spurling, the son-in-law of Marmaduke Wetherell. Wetherell was a big game hunter who had been publicly ridiculed by his employers in the Daily Mail, after finding “Nessie footprints” that turned out to be those of a hippopotamus-foot umbrella stand. To get revenge on the Mail, Wetherell committed the hoax, with co-conspirators Spurling (sculpture specialist), Ian Wetherell (his son, who bought the material for the fake), and Maurice Chambers (an insurance agent). The toy submarine was bought from F.W. Woolworths and its head and neck made out of plastic wood. After testing it out on a local pond, the group went to Loch Ness, where Ian Wetherell took the photos in the vicinity of Altsaigh Tea House. When they heard a water bailiff approaching, Duke Wetherell put his foot out and sank the model. It is presumably still somewhere in Loch Ness. Chambers handed over the plates to Wilson, a friend of his who enjoyed “a good practical joke”. Wilson then took the plates to Ogston’s, an Inverness chemist, where he gave them to George Morrison for development. He sold the first photo to the Daily Mail, who then announced that the Loch Ness Monster had been photographed.

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In 1960, aeronautical engineer Tim Dinsdale filmed a hump crossing Loch Ness, leaving a powerful wake. Dinsdale allegedly spotted the animal on his last day hunting for it, and described the object as reddish with a blotch on its side. When he mounted his camera the object started to move and said that he shot 40 feet of film. Many were sceptical, saying that the “hump” cannot be ruled out as being a boat and claimed that when the contrast is increased, a man can be seen in a boat.

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In 1993, Discovery Communications produced a documentary entitled Loch Ness Discovered, which featured a digital enhancement of the Dinsdale film. A computer expert who enhanced the film noticed a shadow in the negative that was not very obvious in the positive. By enhancing and overlaying frames, he found what appeared to be the rear body of a creature underwater. He commented that “Before I saw the film, I thought the Loch Ness Monster was a load of rubbish. Having done the enhancement, I’m not so sure”. Some have countered this finding by saying that the angle of the film from the horizontal along with sun’s angle on that day made shadows underwater unlikely. Others pointed out that the darker water is undisturbed water that was only coincidentally shaped like a body. The same source also says that there might be a smaller object (a second hump or a head) in front of the hump causing this.

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Further video footage, photographs and even sonar images continued to appear, though with the advent of advanced technology and forensic techniques, the sightings were even more vague and verifications of authenticity were often from somewhat biased collectives as US military monster experts. On 19 April 2014 it was reported that Apple Maps was showing what appeared to be the monster close to the surface of the loch. It was spotted by Andrew Dixon who was browsing a map of his home town at the time and took a moment to take a look at the loch. Possible explanations for the image are that it could be the wake of a boat, a seal causing ripples or a floating log. Some believe that the image was Photoshopped using an image of a whale shark.

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Google commemorated the 81st anniversary of the release of the “Surgeon’s Photograph” with a “Google Doodle”, and added a new feature to their Google street view feature in which users can explore the lake both above water level, and below. Google reportedly spent a week at Loch Ness collecting imagery with one of their street view “trekker” cameras. They attached the camera to a boat to photograph above the water, and collaborated with members of Catlin Seaview Survey to photograph beneath the water.

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Since 1934, many expeditions have sought to find Nessie for both monetary reward, fame and scientific reasons. These have ranged from lone eccentrics on rickety boats to hi-tech sonar surveys, submersible craft and large scale American investigations. Perhaps the most quaintly engaging of these was the The Loch Ness Phenomena Investigation Bureau (LNPIB), a UK-based society formed in 1962 by Norman Collins, R. S. R. Fitter, David James, MP, Peter Scott and Constance Whyte “to study Loch Ness to identify the creature known as the Loch Ness Monster or determine the causes of reports of it.” It later shortened the name to Loch Ness Investigation Bureau (LNIB). It closed in 1972. Its main activity was for groups of self-funded volunteers to watch the loch from various vantage points, equipped with cine cameras with telescopic lenses.

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Although one of the most advanced sonar and mapping surveys, undertaken by the BBC in 2003, essentially proved nothing out of the ordinary inhabited the loch, the mystery still exists. Possible explanations for previous sightings include:
• Bird wakes. The effect on the water’s surface of swimming/landing and taking-off of birds producing a V-effect similar to those regularly attributed to the monster
• Giant eels. Largely discounted, though some species to live in the loch.

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• The aforementioned elephant.
• Sharks. Certain species can survive in fresh water and can grow to a great size.
• Seals. Certainly an environment they could thrive in and would also account for the land sightings

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• Optical effects, natural phenomena (escaping gas etc) and rotting tree debris
• Dinosaurs. Plesiosaurs are often used to represent the beast in mocked-up pictures. I am obliged to tell you why it couldn’t be an extinct creature; the logistics of the dinosaur’s body would not allow its neck to be raised out of the water; plesiosaurs would only be able to thrive in tropical waters; plesiosaurs became extinct around 66 million years ago – the loch has only existed for around 10,000 years.

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The monster has appeared regularly in popular culture throughout the 20th and 21st Centuries.

Film:

• The first film to deal with the creature was Secret of the Loch (1934) an English feature film directed by Milton Rosmer, a “mildly amusing exploitation item”. The monster appeared at the end and was an iguana enhanced by special effects.

• The monster is treated in a tongue-in-cheek fashion in a 1961 film What a Whopper. The monster makes a cartoon appearance at the end of the film.

• The 1964 film 7 Faces of Dr. Lao features the monster as a small fish in a fish bowl which balloons into gigantic proportions when removed from the bowl.

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• In the 1970 film The Private Life of Sherlock Holmes the monster is revealed to be a miniature submarine in disguise.

• The monster is featured in the 1981 American horror film The Loch Ness Horror, directed by Larry Buchanan.

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• In Ghostbusters, (1984) the Loch Ness Monster is among the various things Janine Melnitz asks Winston Zeddemore whether he believes in.

Nessie, das Monster von Loch Ness or Nessie – Das verrückteste Monster der Welt is a West German film made in 1985.

• The 1987 movie Amazon Women on the Moon features a sketch involving a mock TV program, Bullshit or Not?, hosted by Henry Silva in which it is postulated that the Monster was, in fact, Jack the Ripper.

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• Ted Danson starred in the 1996 film Loch Ness in which he plays an American scientist trying to disprove the existence of the Loch Ness Monster, only to later disprove his own evidence when he comes to recognise that the Monster is best left alone to survive by itself.

• The 2001 horror movie Loch Ness Terror deals with a series of attack allegedly made by the monster.

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• In the Disney-Pixar film Monsters, Inc., the Loch Ness monster is mentioned as one of the monsters who got banished from Monstropolis.

• In the 2004 movie Scooby-Doo and the Loch Ness Monster the characters from the Scooby-Doo The Mystery, Inc. gang travel to Loch Ness in Scotland to see the famous Blake Castle, the home of Daphne Blake’s cousin, Shannon.

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• A mockumentary starring director Werner Herzog titled Incident at Loch Ness (2004) shows the director filming scenes around Loch Ness in an attempt to disprove the theories of the monster. His writer/producer continually tries to make a “blockbuster” film that Werner does not want. They eventually run afoul of the real Nessie with eerie results.

• In the 2005 film Lassie, Nessie can be seen swimming in the Loch Ness.

• The 2007 film The Water Horse: Legend of the Deep featured a young boy who discovers and hatches an egg belonging to the legendary Celtic creature, the Water Horse. Naming it Crusoe after the fictional character, he eventually is forced to release it into Loch Ness and the world begins to notice. Based on a novel by Dick King-Smith.

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Beyond Loch Ness (at one point named Loch Ness Terror is a 2008 horror television movie made for the Sci-Fi Channel, directed by Paul Ziller.

• Disney released The Ballad of Nessie along with their main feature Winnie the Pooh in 2011. It is a short cartoon narrated by Scottish comedian Billy Connolly and is a story about Nessie’s origins.

Television:

• The 1964 Gerry Anderson puppet television series, Stingray, included an episode where the crew was transported to Scotland to find the Loch Ness Monster. They discovered that the monster was secretly a robot operated by locals to attract tourists. The Stingray crew agreed to keep the secret once they left Loch Ness.

• In the 1971 Goodies episode Scotland, the Goodies travel to Scotland in order to capture the Loch Ness Monster as an exhibit for the new Monster House at London Zoo.

• In the 1971 Bewitched episode “Samantha and the Loch Ness Monster”, the monster turns out to be a warlock named Bruce that Serena put a spell on.

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• In the 1975 Doctor Who story Terror of the Zygons, the Loch Ness Monster is revealed to be a Skarasen, an alien cyborg controlled by the extraterrestrial race known as the Zygons, who use it in a bid for world.

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• The BBC television series The Family-Ness showed the adventures of a whole family of Loch Ness Monsters and their human friends, Elspeth and Angus McTout.

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• An animated series, Happy Ness: Secret of the Loch, featured two groups of the creatures. The friendly Nessies included Happy Ness, Brave Ness, Forgetful Ness, Silly Ness, and Bright Ness, while the villains included Pompous Ness, Mean Ness, Devious Ness and Dark Ness

• In the TV series How I Met Your Mother one of the main characters, Marshall, has a continuing obsession with the Loch Ness Monster
• The TV series The Simpsons featured the Loch Ness Monster in the episode Monty Can’t Buy Me Love, in which Montgomery Burns captures the monster with the help of Homer Simpson, Professor Frink and Groundskeeper Willie.

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• In Godzilla: The Series, which is an animated ‘continuation’ of the 1998 film, one episode features the Loch Ness monster as a foe of Godzilla.

• An episode of Disney’s Gargoyles titled “Monsters” featured a captured female plesiosaur Dr. Sevarius kept in a hidden cavern within his base of operations beneath Urquhart Castle. His goal was to collect a variety of “exotic DNA” for future mutation experiments and Nessie was merely bait to lure out “Big Daddy” – her larger and more fearsome mate.
• In “Achilles Heel”, the second story in series 7 of The Tomorrow People, a pair of aliens visiting earth to extract a rare mineral found in the vicinity of Loch Ness note that another race of aliens who had previously dominated the earth had transplanted a “giant plascadron” in the lake to ward off the natives.

• An 1978 episode of Scooby-Doo (“A Highland Fling With a Monstrous Thing”) featured a case that tied the Mystery Inc. gang between the Loch Ness Monster, and a phantom that seemed to be controlling it.

Music

• The Sensational Alex Harvey Band wrote a song based on the Loch Ness Monster called “Water Beastie”, which can be heard on their 1978 album Rock Drill. The previous year frontman Alex Harvey recorded and released a spoken-word album, Alex Harvey Presents: The Loch Ness Monster, after spending a summer at Invermoriston and interviewing locals about the Monster.

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• In Spitting Image’s 1986 song “I’ve Never Met a Nice South African”, the narrator claims that he has “met the Loch Ness Monster, and he looks like Fred Astaire”.

• Lo-fi rock band Some Velvet Sidewalk included a song titled “Loch Ness” detailing the exploits of the lake’s mythical monster on their 1992 album “Avalanche”

• American progressive metal band, Mastodon, have a song titled “Ol’e Nessie”, named after the Loch Ness Monster, on their 2002 album Remission.

• The Judas Priest song “Lochness” from their 2005 album Angel of Retribution is about the Loch Ness Monster.

• The Loch Ness Monster was referenced in the Grinderman song Worm Tamer in the line “My baby calls me the Loch Ness monster, two great big humps and then I’m gone”

Literature

• In the Leslie Charteris short story “The Convenient Monster” (1959, coll. 1962) Simon Templar investigates an alleged monster attack, finding a human culprit – who is then attacked by the real monster. A 1966 TV adaptation ends more ambiguously.

• The Scottish poet Edwin Morgan published the sound poem “The Loch Ness Monster’s Song” in 1973

• In the book The Boggart and the Monster (1997) by Susan Cooper, the Loch Ness Monster is actually an invisible shape-shifting creature that has become trapped in one form.

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• In the book Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them (2001) by J.K. Rowling, the “Loch Ness Monster” is said to be a misunderstanding of what is in fact the world’s largest kelpie.

• The Loch (2005) by Steve Alten is a novel about the Loch Ness Monster which incorporates many historical and scientific elements into the story line. In the book, the creature is said to be a species of gigantic and carnivorous Eel.

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• The tabloid Weekly World News often reports on the creature, claiming that it has become pregnant, or been captured, sold, or killed.

• Dick King-Smith wrote a novel, The Water Horse, also the basis for a film

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Naked Massacre aka Born for Hell

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‘A terrifying shocker of unforgiving evil and tasteless torture’

Naked Massacre – aka Born for Hell   is a 1976 West German-Canadian-French-Italian film directed by Denis Héroux (The Uncanny). It stars Mathieu Carrière, Debra Berger and Christine Boisson.

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Plot teaser:

Loosely based on the notorious Richard Speck murders, this is the grim tale of a disturbed Vietnam vet returning home via Belfast, who invades a house shared by eight nurses and proceeds to terrorise and murder them…

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Reviews:

‘This grim Canadian/West German/French/Italian co-production is technically well made, but it isn’t much fun to watch. There’s almost no exposition in the gratuitously bleak story at all – not only is it never revealed exactly why this Speck substitute is hellbent on killing the girls, but he’s never even given a name. Despite the almost unpalatable final half-hour, Born For Hell is still an interesting film, though it probably has more in common with Eurosleaze flicks than with Canadian film.’ Canuxploitation

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Naked Massacre is one of those films that has enough good points that it deserves at least an average rating, yet it is one that I can’t really recommend that anyone sees. It’s one of the more disturbing proto-slasher flicks I’ve seen, with the level of sadism and cruelty displayed by the murderer, and the reaction of the victims, too realistic in its nature to be entertaining.” Terror Titans

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“The movie was quick and intelligent and sharp right up until the torture scenes – so sharp that I really wracked my brain to think if I was somehow missing something in the torture scenes that would make me re-evaluate. Maybe, but I don’t think so. It’s too bad, because the director is obviously very talented, and those first 30 minutes deserve more than to be merely the justification for 45 minutes of sexualized torture.” Cinema de Merde

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Buy the fully uncut, anamorphic version from Amazon.co.uk

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 Hallmark Releasing‘s attempt to get on the Richard Speck bandwagon.

Wikipedia | IMDb

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